So, about my fake tan

I'm reaching the end of my 30's and being a healthy youngster is starting to lose it's grip and my skin isn't what it used to be with that youthful glow. I blame the children for my loss of fresh faced gorgeousness having had life sucked out of me day and night, but in reality it's probably drinking too much wine.

Anyway, I have a wedding reception to attend on Sunday afternoon (a rarity when you are my age, most of us got married in our mid 20's, this will probably be the last wedding I attend till it's my own children's.) The dress code is 'smart casual' so I have been wracking my brains what to wear, when husband pointed out "yeah, but women never actually go 'smart casual' do they?" Thus giving me the excuse to go and buy something new.

So whilst out the other day with the children I passed by French Connection , and grabbed a couple of dresses to try on. 

The first one was like putting on a glove, it fitted perfectly, looked bloody great, was a lilac-grey colour with millions of beads on it, it was so heavy and had snapped the coathanger under it's weight. However despite fitting so well it made me look like the walking dead, my lilac-grey skin colour being sapped by the dress entirely.

I asked the 13 yr old who was waiting outside the changing rooms what he thought. "grunt, no" he said so I took it off and tried on the other.

Whilst I showed him the other dress and he said "The girls who work here were just talking about you" Eh? what did they say ?"One said "that dress looked really good on her," and the other said "yeah but she's not getting it as her kids said it looked horrible, shame eh? " "oh no, that is a shame" !"

So that was that...the dress was purchased before you could say 'zombie'  If 18 yr olds say I look good, then, I'm having it!

So I show husband and he said "well go get a fake tan then" (eh? normally husband wouldn't even pass comment, but I think he is having a mid life crisis of his own, having decided for the first time in his life to convert to contact lenses rather than glasses to "get rid of the dark rings under my eyes")

Which then led to me booking into my local salon (above my old work place the choccie shop funnily enough) and getting myself a Fake Bake....my first and probably my only fake tan ever. (unless you count sunbeds in my early 20's but that fake tan is, well, real isn't it?)

So the next day I was wearing nothing but paper pants, being scrubbed down and then smeared with a chocolate sauce substance and told not to wear a bra or shower for the rest of the day. Odd experience, especially when she did my boobs leaving little rings round my nipples, and I found myself discussing the merits of small tits and wishing I had not breastfed for so long!

I have to say though that the Fake Bake (yes to the untrained fake tanners, this IS the brand name not some wierd slang for the process)  has worked very well, I have a healthy glow, and the dress looks pretty good, so I will be going to the wedding feeling confident rather than wishy washy. 

I guess as I get older these will be the lengths I have to go to to achieve the desired look, I'm hoping the one off tan will be my limit, because once/if I start botox, I fear I will struggle to return to my au natural self and the floodgates of surgery may well be just around the corner!